11 Years, 11 Reasons: Happy Birthday, Blue Dot!

Eleven years ago today, I woke up, vomited copiously, bought a pregnancy test, and sat, with my best friend and flatmate, in the kitchen waiting for the blue dot to disappear.

It didn’t.

We gave it another five minutes.

Still there.

Another ten.

Still there.

And, eleven years later, my son is, well, still there.


So I’m sitting down to write about eleven reasons I think he’s amazing. I don’t often do this sort of thing.

Largely because if there is one single thing guaranteed to make most people want to tear their own arm off and beat themselves unconscious with it just to make the words stop, it’s maternal pride in full flow.

But it’s my birthday on Friday, so I’m doing it anyway. And normal, cynical service will be resumed soon.


1: He Is (Sometimes Very) Funny

Not all the time, granted. But at his best, my spawn has a dry, terse wit that’s pushing at epigrammatic. Or Stewie from Family Guy, at least. β€œI have just been stung by an aquatic delicacy. I am hardly in the mood for seafood.” β€œAh yes. Well, Granny has a very broad centre of gravity…”

2: He Shares

Not all only children get the hang of sharing, to put it very mildly. Z always shares his sweets and chocolate. If he has money and his best friend does not, he will buy a packet of sweets or a toy for each of them out of it. (He made them matching friendship rings for Christmas.)

boys hands clasping each other wearing silver rings.

3: He Is Good At Friendships

Ever since he was very little, Z has formed close friendships. Y’know. The sort of friendships where kids talk solemnly about stuff, secrets, feelings, life in general. And, after a falling out, will discuss what went wrong. He’s also got a knack for monosyllabic blokey friendships and charging around the beach type friendships.

4: He Manages Risk Well

Z considers himself intrepid. And one of the main reasons we can travel longterm and have loads of adventures is because he is both intrepid and plain old sensible about risk. Yes, he sets fire to stuff, cuts things up and enjoys explosions of all kind. But he does so safely.

5: He’s Creative

Any child who paints a face on a beachball in lipstick to make one of the most bizarre internet movies I’ve ever seen is, well, a bit bonkers, frankly. But from paper boats of ever-more-elaborate construction through to beautifully detailed drawings, crazy science experiments and hilarious cartoons, I love Z’s creativity.

6: He’s Smart

This is the point at which, I guess, I lose all my readers but very close relatives. Because if there’s one thing worse than maternal pride, it’s maternal pride in β€œmy genius child”. But it’s almost my birthday. So sod it. Z’s smart. He’s a science whizz, knows huge amounts of, well, stuff, about, well, everything, writes better than some adults when he cares about a topic — such as zombies — and can hold his own in adult conversation.

7: He’s Thoughtful

Z went into a blue study for a couple of days after seeing The Cove. He cares deeply about issues such as poverty, the environment, global politics and nuclear power. He thinks originally about religion, the afterlife, the Big Bang…. Though I have to say his resolution to stop eating fish to save the planet lasted precisely as far as the first sashimi bar.

Z enjoying tuna sashimi

8: He’s Independent

Z can entertain himself, and think for himself. He follows his own path. Once he has decided he does not want to do something –- which is mercifully rare –- he has a stubborn force of will that is extraordinary.

9: He’s Chilled

Z’s father is a Queenslander, a species whose laidbackness is legendary. Even as a baby –- well, at least after H & I had worked out that I was so neurotic about him overheating that the poor little scrap was cold every night -– Z was chilled. He just, well, is.

10: He’s A Movie Geek

I love having geeky conversations about films – and for that matter, TV series too. We can pass many a happy evening debating the pop culture references in Family Guy, comparing versions of Clash of the Titans, or chatting about the finer points of dialogue in 30 Rock.

corrugated iron WC over the water in rural Borneo

11: He’s Intrepid

There aren’t many small boys who have climbed Mount Kinabalu, hiked the Ho Chi Minh Trail, dived an undersea volcano, met hunter-gathering nomads and jumped onto a ferry from a small boat in midwater. He has also coped with almost unfailing good humour with hazards from mosquitoes to squat toilets and keen mobile phone photographers. Props to Z.

And, Happy Birthday, blue dot!


Now, because I’m figuring I lost all you childfree folk out there somewhere around the second paragraph, and Mothers Day has just gone by, I’d love to know.

What do you love about your kids? Soppy is fine.

I mean, seriously, soppy is great. Once in a while…

44 Responses

  1. What, no mention of his trilingual triliterate abilities?

    Ah, crap, wrong blog again.

    Seriously…this is very sweet. I saw his interview on 1Dad1Kid and cracked up through the whole thing.

    • Theodora says:

      Lady, thank you for that! I’m glad you cracked up… I didn’t see it until Talon DMd me to say “cracking up over Z’s answers” when I thought I’d better check before it went live…

      Are you out and about this eve? Supposed to be having some cocktails with a crazy mom friend, who I met when her husband almost ran me over. She went all round India on a bike with her first child when she was nine.

      Her children, for the record, speak a couple of languages. Which I know not because she has told me this but because I have heard them speak them…

  2. Awwwwww. This is so sweet. I hope Z writes his 11 reasons why you’re a great mother and traveling pal.

    My little bundle is like a minature Hercules Poirot at the moment. She leads with her stomach, investigates everything and makes all kinds of funny exclamations. She is very scientific, always testing out what fits where (her foot is stuck in a toy as I write this). She is an amazing mimic. Her version of telling a joke — with an elbow on the table, a longwinded introduction and a punchline that makes her throw her head back with laughter — just has to be seen to be believed. Oh, and she just loves to applaud herself.

    In some ways I can’t wait for her to learn to talk. In other ways I’d like to preserve her baby funniness forever.

    • Hehe I can just see Z’s 11 reasons. 11 reasons in 11 words!

    • Theodora says:

      I am hoping to take a big stick to him and get him to do some tips on travel for kids, actually. Given he keeps checking his stats and bitching about his traffic but can’t be arsed to write anything. Chances of “Why I Like Travelling with My Mum (Mom)?” close to zero.

      I’m glad you appreciate the baby funniness and want to keep her that way. She sounds fab. Hope we get to Singapore in time to meet you all. And applause is great. Because she learnt that from you and Darling Man. As she did the good joke. And that’s an amazing thing for her to have.

      When Z was little, because I was a younger parent, I think, and because he’s the first, and because i’m impatient, a lot of it was about “moving on, milestones” without so much being in the moment and appreciating him as he is at that frozen moment in time. It’s something I regret. As I regret working too much. It’s good to see that you can live in the moment with Poppy, and preserve it. I’d love to see a post from you on that, actually.

  3. Yes! Awesome! I love these 11 reasons. Z and Miro share the same birthday! That’s totally incredible. Great post… and, I LOVE Adventurous Kates’s comments. I’m still cracking up!!!

  4. i love this. and happy birthday in a few days!! and happy birthday, blue dot!! i love your 11 reasons. it makes me smile. and think how i’d pare down my reasons for my own daughter (i am sure you had WAY more than 11 to begin with)…;)

    • Theodora says:

      I didn’t put as much thought into it as I probably should have done, Jessie. It’s one of those posts that just comes straight out of your head, as it were. And, yes, there were many more than 11 reasons.

  5. Sonja Key says:

    You weren’t soppy at all! Your post is lovely. And I love what you’re doing with your son – traveling around the world. He’s a lucky kid.

  6. What I love about my kids…well, they’re furry. They love me unconditionally, except for if I forget to feed them. They keep me warm at night. They are always excited to see me when I get home, and purr even before I start petting them. They also took to their new “parents” well when we decided to roam the world without them. *sigh*

    They’re not so good at sharing though, and I can’t say they are crazy creative.

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY

    • Theodora says:

      Z is keen for some “kids” of his own, actually. So you manage to travel with them? That’s pretty amazing. We appear to have acquired a cat, that pops round to ours to be fed milk.

  7. …in a few days!! And happy blue dotaversary!

    (hit enter by accident).

  8. aww, great stuff! particularly enjoyed reasons 1, 2, and 11… rare qualities in most kids.

    Happy B-day!

    cheers,
    HipTraveler

  9. Crystal says:

    My 2 year old, Elanor, is exuberant. Her unending exuberance and enthusiasm for life is….well, exhausting for her dad and I, but we are proud of the fearless way she has embraced life in Singapore (with far less fear and trepidation than her dad and I)

  10. Rachel says:

    I’m with Crystal – I can’t for the life of me understand their deep seated belief that their parents know best, but I love them for it. Maybe that ‘Because I’m the Mommy, that’s why…’ t-shirt was worth every penny?

    11 years ago today I was in my 9th month!! Can’t believe how long ago it was!

  11. Roy says:

    Awwww, how sweet πŸ™‚

  12. Nicole says:

    Aw, Z is my kind of person! *I* want to be his friend. All the best qualities, and I didn’t once want to tear off my arm and beat myself with it while reading this. It was quite the opposite. πŸ™‚

  13. Raymond says:

    “This is a zombie apocalypse mate, luxuries can wait”. — Z

    Now THAT seems like a pretty cool kid! Great post and Happy Birthday!

    • Theodora says:

      He is a very cool kid. Quietly so, rather than “cool crew” cool. Thank you for the birthday wishes. I always associate blue dot day with my birthday, cos it was two or three days prior to it, and there was a very, erm, large night out for a friend’s birthday that I was supposed to go to that evening, which would have involved a whole exotic range of unfoetus-friendly activity. so I said I was ill…

  14. nikki says:

    Feel lucky to know both of you. You are an inspiring team:)!!
    xo

  15. He sounds delightful, and more so for his big adventure xx

  16. Lisa Wood says:

    Well you didnt lose me!! I kept on reading and was amazed at how many wonderful great qualities you could see in your son πŸ™‚ Loved every one of them.

    I have five boys and each of them are different….I have never thought to write about each one and why I love them so much….so here goes

    H – is so super fit and into every sport he can get his hands on and has big careers moves that he is working towards.

    Z- is super sensitive and kind. He is funny – he is more of a geek than sporty!

    N – is super loud. I think because there is so many boys in one family that he feels like the middle child! He is super cool at being big brother to his younger brothers.

    C – is really funny! He says the most funniest things, and thinks differently. He is really into making money and his only 9!

    K – is the baby of the family and oh my gosh does he have all of his brothers worked out – he has wrapped every single one of his brothers around his finger! He so loves animals. Every night he goes out to see how many frogs are outside to say goodnight to them!

    What a great blog – and happy belated birthday blue dot!!!

    Cheers
    Lisa

    • Theodora says:

      What a lovely list, Lisa. I imagine five different personalities must be immensely rewarding — if sometimes challenging. Respect to you for taking them all over Oz, and thanks for your beautiful comment.

  17. Although every age brings its own parenting smiles, I think 11 has to be the very best age. For that single year, they seem to walk a magical line between innocence and worldliness and then…*pfffft*…the world grabs them and runs hell-bent towards adulthood. Enjoy your 11.

    Oh, and I love my kids because my kids taught me everything I needed to know about love: how to give it *and* how to receive it.

    • Theodora says:

      I am looking forward to 11. That hits in November… And, yes, I do hope he hangs onto his childhood that little bit longer…

  18. Suzanne says:

    From one proud Mum to another. My son Alex is just like Z……..I am amazed by his imagination and adore him….I cant wait to start our travels together. Thanks for the inspiration. X

    • Theodora says:

      Hey, Suzanne! It’s a pleasure.. And I’m sure you’ll love it too. Thanks for your lovely comment.

  19. Honestly I can’t think of anything worse than having children but seriously, this is very very sweet and he sounds like an awesome kid (no, let’s say person, he’s 11 after all!) to be travelling with πŸ™‚

    • Theodora says:

      “I can’t think of anything worse than having children…” Bwahahaha!

      I’ve always wanted to have kids, so don’t entirely differentiate between them and people (though, god, sometimes you have to!), but he is a great person to travel with.

  20. Becki Orth says:

    I don’t have any children, so I can’t relate to what it is like to having one, or traveling with one. But you didn’t lose me this blog post, and I found it completely entertaining!

    I came across your blog last week, and have been hooked since. I even started reading Zac’s today and told my fiancΓ© how wonderful it is!

    My fiancΓ© and I are going to be selling everything next year and leaving for South America for a while and I know the travel bug will never leave my body, and I often ponder what it would be like to travel with a child if it were to happen for us. Reading this post and Zac’s blog makes me smile and feel relaxed that it is ok to up and leave with your child to do what you think is right. And if that is seeing the world, so be it!

    I give a million plus props out to you and Zac for fulfilling your dreams, and I cannot wait to read more! πŸ™‚

    Cheers!

    Becki and Andy

  21. I never knew what mom bragging was and never really understood it until I had my own child. So brag all you want because I’m sure Z is a magnificent child. Our daugher, Franki, who’s three + now, is amazing in every way. She’s observant beyond what I ever thought possible…for anyone. She’s sensitive to energy and she’s thoughtful and kind. In fact, she tells me often that I’m handsome and kind. πŸ˜‰ She’s funny and is eager to laugh. She’s curious about her world, without presumption. She’s playful and fun. She’s clear-minded and knows what she wants at the ripe old age of three. She will not be talked into doing anything she doesn’t want to do. She knows that my job isn’t to manipulate her into doing what I want her to do. And I love that about her. She’s bright and sweet and caring. She cares and nurtures younger children. She wants to hug and care for the other children, younger or older. She shares willingly (most times) unless it’s something special to her, to which it’s her “right” if she chooses not to share. She is happy. She is delightful. She is eager about life. She is relaxed and easy. There’s something “different” about her…she’s focused and present rather than scattered and wiry. I adore this child more than I ever knew I could. Just before she was born, I said to my husband, “I hope I like this kid”. That’s so funny to me now. I love the way she expresses herself and I love the way she be’s…she is amazing. Thank you for creating a space for sharing my love and adoration for my child. πŸ™‚

    • Theodora says:

      And thank you for sharing yours, too, Christine. She sounds fantastic.

      I’d like to declare this the non-braggy mom-braggy space on the internet!

  22. sunnyjean says:

    I love this… So sweet, hilarious and so so like life of a mother… and living it to the fullest (good, bad and all)… thank you for sharing…

    I wish you the best with your son…

  23. claire says:

    That was gr8, your son sounds so cool n amazing as does youself. Im 35 and my son is 12 at the end of january and i have seriously been thinking of us both going traveling, im not sure where yet, maybe south africa, asia, egypt i have a few places id loved 2 go with him just like yourselfs, id like to be moving about and staying in certain places for and how long as we choose but i am actually uneployed, i can get work as we go right?? I totally admire what you and your son are doing, well done and take care… claire..xx

    • Theodora says:

      Hi Claire, Thanks for your comment and I’m so glad you’re thinking of travel. Earning enough money to support a child in the developing world as a foreigner can be difficult — wages are low and the job market highly competitive, so the best jobs tend to be ones that can be done remotely, or using existing marketable skills, such as a teaching qualification. The problem with bar work and similar is that they don’t pay enough to support a child and cover child care. On the plus side, if you could live with family and work here in the UK to save up money, you can live a good lifestyle in much of South-East Asia or Egypt on Β£500 a month. Other things you could look at? Being a virtual assistant online, or any legitimate online home-working job. If you tell me what skills you have I might be able to provide more constructive help — do let me know.

  24. Linda says:

    So – two years late – I actually logged into your blog today to read about Everest Base Camp (still haven’t read that yet), and somehow got distracted and ended up in this thread….possibly because I am about to bid yet another goodbye to my elder son, who also has wanderlust, and so, even though he’s 31 my motherly instincts are uppermost today. This wasn’t at all sloppy (well, of course, another mother of sons is bound to say that, isn’t she!). You might well find that in the next few years it might embarrass him, but I wanted you to know that he will grow out of that! “Why don’t you have any pictures of me surfing?” asked elder son recently. “Because you didn’t want me hanging around with your surfer dude friends when you were 16,” was my answer. He regrets that now :=)

    I gave them everything I thought I could and they needed prepare them for independence when it came. Wish I’d one what you’re doing, though!

    I really need to go back and read lots of your previous posts.

    • Theodora says:

      Aw, Linda, thank you for the sentiment. I am going to be the ultimate embarrassing mum in probably approximately two years’ time. Or — maybe, just maybe — he’ll put up with me…

      Mind you, I was the teenager from hell, so I have some karma headed my way. I remained a teenager from hell until approximately age 24, as well.

      *sigh*

      • Elena says:

        I have been reading about you and your son’s traveling all over the world. How wonderful is that!!!! I wanted to registered to get your news letters but the site was taken down. I hope you get this one.

        • Theodora says:

          Would you like me to register you, Elena? That’s very odd if the signup isn’t working….